


Icy River

by Bite_Me_Tin_Can



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Arguments, Depressed Gavin Reed, Gavin is doing his best, Half-assed hurt/comfort, Heavy Angst, M/M, Nines is doing his best, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:42:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29765322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bite_Me_Tin_Can/pseuds/Bite_Me_Tin_Can
Summary: Gavin has always had to deal with his mental health alone. The panic attacks, the nightmares, the depressive episodes, the times Gavin would stare off into space and refuse to talk to anyone. Those were all helplessly Gavin. After a particularly bad day, Nines is there to talk Gavin down from doing something he'll regret. After a plunge, Nines has to save Gavin.
Relationships: Upgraded Connor | RK900/Gavin Reed
Comments: 3
Kudos: 36





	Icy River

**Author's Note:**

> Bam! Here's your angsty hurt/comfort. Love you!

Gavin stood in the cold December air at three in the morning. He'd barely touched any alcohol that night, yet he felt so drunk and exhausted. His mind kept pushing him, hurling insults at him from inside. Gavin felt his hands shake, clutching the metal fencing he leaned on. Gavin found himself on the wrong side of the railing of a large bridge, icy water beneath him. He must've been fifty feet up in the air. It was probably less than that, but Gavin couldn't bring himself to care about the distance. He needed to feel something, needed to bleed. If he went home and made himself bleed, he'd find himself in therapy or some god damn shrink's office again. His fiancé cared too much to let him mutilate his skin. Nines cared too much to let him try to kill himself. That's why Gavin only left a note once Nines had gone to sleep and left in the middle of the night.

Gavin found it hard to breathe, his leather jacket doing little to protect him from the cold air and the snow. The cold was only made worse with the wind that slid across the river. Gavin thought back to the argument he and Nines had had earlier that night. Gavin blamed himself for his fiancé's anger. Blamed himself for everything that had gone wrong.

_"What the fuck was that for, tin can?" Gavin's angry words sounded so foreign._

_"What do you think, Gavin? You could have died! You have to stop throwing yourself into danger, you have to realize that I can be fixed or replaced! You can't!" Nines was furious, letting his anger show through his glaring red LED. Gavin ignored it._

_"You're not expendable, dickwad! When are you going to realize that I don't give a fuck that you can be fixed easily, because you're my partner and I care about you!" Gavin never thought he'd sound so pissed off while telling someone he cared about them._

_"I know I'm not expendable, detective, but you have to realize that my injuries mean nothing if I can be backed up. Human beings can't be."_

_Gavin felt his blood run cold when Nines called him 'detective.' He hated when Nines called him that. It made him feel like they were back at square one, when Nines barely cared about the older man. Gavin felt his patience leave him at that moment. "Maybe I don't want to be backed up. I know I can't be replaced with another me, but any other human could. I'm just one guy, Nines. One person out of billions of people in the world. My life is nothing compared to millions. If I die, then so be it, but you are the most advanced Android to exist. You can't be replaced."_

_Nines found himself startled, staring at Gavin in disbelief. He couldn't find a response before Gavin interrupted again._

_"You're immortal, Nines. But if something happened and you couldn't be brought back or backed up again, I don't know what I'd do. But Nines, I'm not immortal. I can age. I can get hurt. I'm getting older every day, and you're flawless forever. One day I'm going to be gone, and you'll move on and find something."_

_"Gav-"_

_"No, Nines. I can't be the perfect husband for you. For your sake, maybe we should end things. Find another Android for you. Someone you can be with forever."_

_NInes had no idea what had come over Gavin, but these were not healthy things to talk about. These were not healthy thoughts to have. It sounded... To Nines, it sounded almost like a goodbye. "What? S-so that's it? You're just going to break up with me?"_

_Gavin turned away, trying to hide his tears. Nines didn't care if Gavin saw him crying, however, the Android's face covered in tears already. Gavin didn't give an answer._

_"God dammit, Gavin, when are you going to realize that I'm not going anywhere? When are you going to realize that I'm not going to just turn around and leave you because I can outlive you?" Gavin didn't respond so Nines kept talking. "I love you, Gavin Reed. I love you more than I thought was possible, even for a deviant. I never want you to think that just because I'm an Android and you're human that I'm going to pick up and leave when I find something better. Gavin, you're what I want."_

_Gavin pushed past Nines. "I'll see you at home."_

_The argument ended there. Nines didn't push, didn't go after Gavin. That was his first mistake._

Gavin rubbed his thumb over his silver wedding band. He and Nines decided that elaborate engagement rings with small gems weren't worth it. They were too frou-frou for them, anyways. They'd decided on traditional wedding bands, covered in smooth silver metal. It was Gavin's decision, actually, and Nines thought it sounded perfect. Gavin massaged the cold metal, trembling as he tried to gain any form of comfort from it. He closed his eyes, taking a breath as sobs racked his body. His body lip quivered as he tried to stay quiet. Even in his desperate last moments, he was too worried about whether or not he seemed weak.

Why couldn't he just figure out issues? He hated that he hurt Nines every time he fell into his pit of despair, hated that every time he felt worthless he somehow made Nines feel worthless.

One movement, one step, and it could all be over. Gavin's phone rang in his pocket, and he pulled it out to look at the called ID. It was Nines. _Fuck_ , Gavin thought. He couldn't even die right.

He declined the call, turned his phone off, then tossed his phone aside on the bridge behind him. Gavin closed his eyes, ready to step forward, but he didn't. Not yet. He just stood there, embracing the cold. He was there for maybe twenty minutes before he heard a car pull up, maybe thirty yards away. Gavin thought back to the second fight he and Nines had that night.

_Gavin had already eaten by the time Nines came home. He'd had some leftover pizza, not caring to listen to his fiancé's rant about healthy eating habits. Gavin had also had a beer, and was about to open a second one before Nines came in through their apartment door. The drinking started the second fight of the night._

_"I thought you said you were going to stop drinking, Gavin." Nines' voice was quiet, as if he'd been crying._

_Gavin set the beer down on the coffee table, hanging his head as he listened to Nines rant about his health. For the second time today, Gavin was responsible for his lover crying. Gavin looked up, but not before Nines had gone to go and shower. Gavin was tempted to call Hank or Connor or someone, just to talk or rant about everything. If Gavin called Hank, he'd get chewed out for acting like a dick to the one person who cared about him. If he called Connor, he'd get yelled at for making Nines upset. Gavin considered calling Tina, but he knew she would drop everything to talk to him, but she had a date that night and Gavin wasn't going to fuck that up for her._

_Gavin decided to put the second beer back in the fridge and go to bed early. He took off his jacket and tossed it aside, not bothering to even put on pajamas, falling into bed in his t-shirt and jeans. He didn't even take off his belt. He was too tired. Well, at least he thought he was tired. Gavin let his eyes slide shut as he laid in bed, facing the wall so he wouldn't have to look at Nines when he came in._

_Nines finished his shower after ten minutes, coming into the bedroom wearing some old sweats and one of Gavin's hoodies. Nines saw Gavin laying in bed and went to climb in next to him. Nines didn't scan Gavin to see if he was awake or asleep, knowing the shorter man hated being scanned. So Nines didn't. He climbed into bed behind Gavin, wrapping his arm around him and kissing the back of his neck._

_"I love you, Gavin. Everything will be better in the morning." Nines closed his eyes and went into stasis beside the man he loved, not even bothering to check on Gavin before he drifted off to 'sleep.'_

_That was the second mistake._

Gavin didn't have to look up to know who was in the car. He didn't have to look up to know who was running towards him. He recognized his fiancé calling his name almost immediately. Gavin didn't look at Nines, didn't lean into the touch as Nines wrapped his arms around Gavin. Nines clutched onto the material of Gavin's jacket, desperately clinging to him as if he was the last thing that could possibly save the man he loved.

Gavin finally let his tears flow freely. He leaned his head back slightly, resting it on Nines' shoulder. Nines put his hand on Gavin's cheek, sobbing into his hair. 

"Gavin, please, _please_ , I'm so sorry. This is all my fault, I shouldn't have- I-I should've been there-"

Gavin put his hand on Nines' and gave it a soft squeeze. Immediately, all thoughts of jumping and ending everything were replaced with the thought of losing Nines. Gavin sobbed loudly, feeling oh so lost. 

"Shut up, tin can, I'm the one who should be sorry!" Nines was stunned by Gavin's sudden outburst. He startled a bit, letting go of Gavin. 

Gavin carefully turned around, still on the wrong side of the fence. Gavin wiped his tears away, rubbing his eyes. "I'm so sorry, tin can... I shouldn't have treated you like that. I-I know you were just worried, worried about me. God I'm such a douchebag. I love you, and you deserve to be treated right."

Nines jumped forward, pressing lips against Gavin's. Soft lips pressed together, Nines leaned forward and kissed Gavin as if it was the last thing he would ever do. Gavin didn't get a chance to kiss back before the barrier let out a loud, metallic groan. Gavin gasped, nearly falling back as he clung to the metal fence. Something had happened and it was too frail to stand up alone. Nines grabbed the front of Gavin's jacket, refusing to let Gavin fall in the barrier broke. Gavin felt scared for the first time in years. Gavin's cheeks were covered with tears as Gavin leaned forward and kissed Nines. "I'm sorry."

Gavin quickly pushed Nines back, the barrier breaking with one last heave. Gavin was suddenly falling back off of the bridge, plummeting into the icy cold water. Nines let out a horrified scream, feeling his heart fill with an icy cold dread. Before he could even realize what he was doing, he found himself jumping into the water after his lover.

The ice cold water hit Nines like a bullet. It surrounded his body in a frozen pain, seeping cold into his biocomponents. Nines quickly pushed himself deeper into the water, searching frantically for Gavin. If Nines stayed in the water any longer, he would shut down in two minutes. Nines knew he had to hurry. He had already called for emergency services before he had gone in after Gavin. 

It took forty five seconds before Nines found Gavin under the water. He grabbed Gavin by his shirt, pulling him up and to the surface of the water. He frantically pushed forward to the shore, doing everything he could to keep Gavin's head above the water. Soon, Nines reached to river bank, pulling Gavin onto the mud with him. Nines felt his Thirium run cold as he realized that Gavin wasn't breathing,

"Gavin? Gavin? Gavin, hey! Hey, wake up!" Nines pushed Gavin onto his back, hands shaking as he removed Gavin's soaked jacket. He frantically started CPR, trying everything he could to get Gavin to breathe again. His tears were flowing freely down his face, sobs racking his body. He pressed rhythmically on Gavin's chest, pressing for thirty seconds before trying to force him to breathe by giving mouth-to-mouth. Thirty more compressions, followed by more mouth-to-mouth. It took four rounds of CPR before Gavin coughed up water, taking a deep breath of cold air.

Nines felt relief flood his body as he lifted Gavin and held him to his chest. Nines kissed Gavin's head, taking in a deep inhale through his hair. Gavin shakily put his hand on Nines' cheek, looking up at him with tired eyes. 

"I love you, Nines."

Nines let out a shaky laugh.

"I love you too, Gavin."

The two stayed there on the shore, taking in each other's warmth as the sounds of ambulances in the distance closed in.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for that mess of emotions.


End file.
